REMEMBER back in the day when we misbehaved in school or repeatedly flunked tests, our rear ends (or palms of our hands at the very least) would sting from the whooping we’d get with rattan canes? At the Eye’s alma mater, the principal even let you take your pick of rattans — they had it all. Thick, thin, super thin… you’d be a real smart-ass (your rear smarting all the way) if you picked the super thin ones that cut.

Plus, there was no such thing as crawling home for pity. Parents back then would’ve said “Very good! Serves you right!” We’d go home, head hung in shame, unable to sit comfortably for days and receive even more whooping at home, to top it all. In fact, we’d receive an additional bonus ‘spanking’ if we tried to hide the school punishment from the parents.

Things are different these days. Several school teachers recently related some horror-stories and experiences in dealing with the parents of today to a friend of the Eye.

In one such incident, a teacher poke about a female student had been absent from school for a number of consecutive days. Naturally, being the girl’s teacher, she called the parents of the girl to inform them that their precious little daughter had been AWOL from school. She was taken aback with the blasé answer that they gave her — “Oh, but we haven’t seen our daughter for two days already…”

In another incident, a spot-check unveiled some printouts of a student in nude poses with several boys. Concerned that a young girl was getting herself exploited in pornography, the principal called the parents in for a discussion. Instead of being shocked, stupefied, disappointed, upset or any of the feelings that parents should naturally experience when facing such news, this student’s parents instead hit back at the school for (are you ready for this?) invading their daughter’s privacy!

These days, teachers are liable to face lawsuits if they as much wave a rattan in front of a student. These days schools cannot enforce the kind of discipline method they did during the days of the missionaries. These days the students seem to have the upper hand. Some argue that parents these days are more lenient and take a more liberal approach to child-upbringing because they do not want their little ones to experience the ‘hardships’ that they had ensured back then. Fair enough to not want them to ‘suffer’, but to spoil the child?

Several weeks ago, the Eye wrote of a young girl who had “been there, done that”, i.e. done everything that no sane nor decent child would even come close to think of doing. This young girl’s story and the stories above are not isolated incidences. If we really opened our eyes and ears, we’d notice that there are quite a number of school going kids these days who are ‘growing up’ too fast — getting into sexual exploits, drugs, gansterism and ending up in trouble with the law. Go to the clubs and you’d sometimes find puny sized kiddies partying out on the weekends with their older friends and most of the time, high on Nospen and a myriad of other hallucinogens.

There’s nothing wrong with allowing your child to attain maturity a little faster than the rest — well guided maturity in the sense that the child knows his or her priorities and responsibilities. Discipline does not necessarily mean taking out the good ol’ rattan each time the child misbehaves. At the same time, don’t let your kids ‘rosak’ because you’re too busy attaining monetary means to ensure that they live a comfortable life.

A friend recently posed this question — “what’s the difference between bail money and college funds?” The answer is simply “effective parenting”. E-comments welcomed at matalelah@yahoo.co.uk